A self-portrait of the illustrator.
Art & Illustration, Mental Health

Self-Portrait October 2020

Creating a self-portrait can be almost therapeutic when you have body image issues. Approaching an illustration of yourself like you would one for someone else requires intimately studying your own face, spending a lot of time with it, and finding the beauty in it even when you don’t see that beauty everyday in the mirror. As an artist, you have to stop hating your subject and find things to love about it, even if loving yourself is sometimes difficult.

I’m one of those people who generally loathes every picture anyone takes of me. The muscles on one side of my face are weak, contributing to a more than usual asymmetry. One side of my mouth doesn’t smile as much as the other does. Add in a history of abuse and the fact that I’m getting older every minute (with the host of messages society sends about women and age), and my relationship with how I look gets real messy, real fast.

But you know, after working on this project for a couple days and staring at a picture of myself for hours on end, I’m really quite pleased with this, and I don’t quite hate how I look.

Self-portrait of Cal Harper, completed October 2020.

Leave a Reply

Fill in your details below or click an icon to log in:

WordPress.com Logo

You are commenting using your WordPress.com account. Log Out /  Change )

Google photo

You are commenting using your Google account. Log Out /  Change )

Twitter picture

You are commenting using your Twitter account. Log Out /  Change )

Facebook photo

You are commenting using your Facebook account. Log Out /  Change )

Connecting to %s